Wednesday, November 10, 2010


someone please tell me how thanksgiving is in two short weeks?
I feel like school just started, but apparently time doesn't wait for anybody.

I want to thank all readers who put in their two sense about seeing yourself in "reality" aka the REAL you.  sometimes just knowing I am not alone is reassuring in itself.  the best part of blogging?  being able to share hardships/obstacles/feelings regardless of how stupid they may sound and getting feedback.  so a big THANK YOU to all who commented.  and also, a big THANK YOU to all my readers in general, because you are the reason I keep writing and updating secret doors.

I played pick-up games for soccer preseason yesterday.  keep in mind that I am a perfectionist, so not being the best isn't really an option.  however, seeing that I haven't played soccer (FOR REAL. playing for 1/4 a game and then breaking my wrist doesn't count) in about 2-3 years, my skills were lacking.  this is hard for me.  I know I have nothing to prove to anybody, but it sort of feels that way.  all I have thought about and talked about during these past few years in recovery is how badly I wanted to play soccer, but now I'm wondering if I should even try out.  I want it, but then I don't want it.  I love it, but then I don't love it.  it's a decision I have to make, yet how do I make it?

have you ever been so excited for something, then you were suddenly bombarded with second thoughts?

happy wednesday


  1. Love your hot little mini. Such a cute look. ANd yes, I have definitely been super excited about something than had second thoughts. it happens to me A LOT

  2. No problem :) I understand being busy lol! And yes, I hate when you get so excited and then your "little voices" come in and try to make you second guess yourself. You have to stand up to them! lol. By the way, I am very jealous of that shirt XD

  3. i ADORE this outfit :D

    you look so pretty!

  4. First, you look amazing, as per usual - I love your boots. Second, gah! I totes agree with the Thanksgiving thing. I cannot believe that it will be here so soon. I feel as if the holiday season is already flying by!

    I have definitely be in your situation before - being completely excited about something and then having second thoughts. I think that you just have to go with what your head and heart agree on and hope for the best. :)

  5. Do it! Play soccer! If you don't try then you'll keep wondering "what if". However, if you go ahead, try, and realize you don't want to do it..well, at least you TRIED and that's what matters.

  6. First I would like to say that your blouse is so lovely! Where did you happen to buy it? i seriously wish I owned your wardobe or had a better fashion sense in general.
    second i felt the exact way about cross country, this sprot and i have alaway had a love hate relationship but even though there are somethign I dont like about it or I know that i am not the best at it or I know that i wont like some of the practices sometimes i still do it becuase it gives me a sense of accpomlishment plau hey you only live once so why not do it all.