Tuesday, September 21, 2010

past

"It's cut cut cutting me down
Like slow poison
Cut down, like slow poison"
the bravery



thrifted talbots jacket, f21 shirt, ae jeggings, uo sparkly sneakers

I swear, I have one playlist that I listen to over and over just for the sake of nostalgia.  Why do I feel the need to relive moments that have already happened?  Good question.  I'm still trying to figure that out.

No matter how many times I try and let go of the past and stay in the present, it doesn't work.  I'm like a past addict.  If something good, or bad for that matter, happened, I milk it to death.  I think about the good over and over and try to replicate that situation or event -- how I looked, how I acted, the feeling I got from it.  And the bad goes the same way; I over think it and declare myself "scarred for life".  It's gotten to the point where I associate my "skinny self" with a fun, social girl who had amazing fashion sense.  I think I get this from the girl I was when I started my sophomore year last fall.  My head is saying "BE THAT GIRL", but my heart knows that she wasn't healthy.  

are you effected by your past?
how so?

sweet dreams
xoxo

5 comments:

  1. LOVING blazers right now.

    its hard to let go of the past until you accept it. REALLY accept it-- not just say you do.

    more complicated than I thought, thats for sure.

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  2. I dont think I have ever agreed with a post this much! First, songs have this strange affect on me that they bring me back to certain times or situations. I am a deja vu person,and a past person, and I always go back and fourth in my head repeating what should be considered ancient history to me. The thing is, without letting go of the past and just accepting the "now", this exact thing happens ( and to me as well ) that you think of the could haves and should I's. But either way, I think its something that nearly everyone does from time to time.
    <3kimi

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  3. I think it's hard not to be affected by your past; but once you accept that what's done is done, I think that you can move on and be a better person.

    Ohmigosh Emily I NEED those UO sparkly sneakers. LOVE!! :)

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  4. Hello my pretty fashionista! I bought my first blazer last week and I absolutely love it!

    The past doesn't really affect me.. I mean, it's obviously led me to the messed up state I'm in now (ED) but, I try to just live in the present and look forward to the future instead of dwelling on what happened/could have happened.

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  5. Love this look you look amazing. And don;t let your past dictate your future girl! Your future is so bright!

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